On Burning Bridges and Nuzzling Adversity. As an adult adoptee, the older I get the more mannerisms I see in myself from my parents. If there’s any question regarding the nature versus nurture debate, I can tell you firsthand that it hardly matters if you’re bought or birthed. By way of example, my brother (Jeff) […]

And the 10 Steps to Take if You Do. The power of the human mind is wonderful and boggling – except when it turns on you while peppering your psyche with a staccato of queries about your relationship.  One minute your partner’s grandeur is so intense, it’s cartoonish. How did you ever land such a […]

Let’s get candid about male mental health. Men don’t get a lot of compassion — not as a gender, not toward one another, and not toward ourselves. We are the more impulsive, less refined gender that has not progressed much since our cave-dwelling days. We’ve learned to use a salad fork since then, however, and […]

The first time I saw a flameless cigarette lighter anywhere but a car was on an enclosed patio wall of the Oakland psychiatric facility where my therapist had sent me due to anxiety and depression. Smoking was the only vice afforded to us. Though even while despondent, I wasn’t interested in adding nicotine to a […]

My generation grew up in an era not known for leaps in technological advances. The lack of fun, lithium-ion powered iThings forced us to engage in antiquated traditions like going outside, socializing or reading. On the upside, living offline allowed us to keep screw-ups to limited audiences. We also experienced less bullying, anxiety and depression […]

This is the time of year that Americans pack on a pound or few, while a quiet majority actually loses weight. Like an average of an entire boyfriend/girlfriend. Fall is summer’s hangover. During summer we are often busy with vacations, events, outings, and cruising through the long, action-packed days of our relationships. Any musings whether […]

There is no upside to negative thinking. It does not prep you for life events, ward off malicious mojo or prevent worrisome outcomes. It does the opposite. It also causes face furrows, addictions, mental disorders, insomnia and heart disease. Most of us unknowingly use automatic thought distortions (aka, mental filters) to subvert ourselves. When we […]

A Fremont native’s new book helps parents of teens struggling with anxiety. BY LOU FANCHER When he was 13, Jon Patrick Hatcher began cutting himself, and he wrestled with years of substance abuse and panic attacks. As his parents struggled to understand him, they decided their son would benefit from professional help. Talk therapy—and Hatcher’s […]

At home and on social media, you’re an extroverted badass. In public, you become an isolationist dodging eye contact and handshakes, with a tendency towards agoraphobia and a general excitement over cancelled plans. Your favorite party trick is not going. What is Social Anxiety? The most common of all the anxiety disorders, social anxiety is […]